Wetzel: A coach’s lessons on fatherhood … from 1948

Inside a small courtroom in a small (pop. 202) Mississippi town on Thursday, the football world waited for a decision on the college eligibility of Ole Miss star quarterback Trinidad Chambliss.

Chambliss would ultimately be granted an injunction against the NCAA that would grant him a sixth year of eligibility and send him back to Oxford as a Heisman favorite for the championship-contending Rebels. The NFL Draft will have to wait another year.

Yet despite all the significance of the decision, the topic of most heated discussion emerged…paternity?

Part of Chambliss’ reasoning was that in 2022, a severe case of tonsillitis significantly affected his sleep and caused him to not see any on-field action, entitling him to a medical redshirt season.

Ole Miss quarterbacks coach Joe Judge, formerly the head coach of the New York Giants, was called to testify for Chambliss. One of the questions was about the importance of sleep for football players.

Judge decided to rely on his experience in both the pros and college and discussed how he handled players who had a child during their season – and their significant others.

“We have to educate,” the judge said of his conversation with the child’s mother. “This conversation is always difficult. It’s not even popular.”

Judge added, “We need to educate significant others who may become pregnant or have children during the season.”

“And you have to educate them, ‘You’ve got this kid in the middle of the season, dad’s got to play good football, OK? This is a production business day in and day out. He’s got to be ready to perform and go out there and play… You’ve got to let him sleep. He’s got to be in another room, isolated.'”

“You have to explain to mom like, ‘Hey, listen, he’s not waking up for midnight feeds. After the season, he’s full-metal jacket. Do whatever you want with him. He can change every diaper. But in the season, he has different priorities,'” Judge concluded.

Soccer coaches, they don’t just teach the game, they teach life lessons… since 1948.

Let’s give the judge here some grace. The married father of four is known for his modesty in football and being extremely family-oriented, which is not universal in that business. Testifying can also be nerve-wracking, and given anything else, he might have omitted the analogy or at least added further clarification.

He was trying to make a point to help his player get an injunction; He certainly didn’t expect it to go viral.

And look, if one parent wants to go through a meat grinder to handle midnight feedings, diaper changes, and all that stuff, while the other parent can spend 10 hours a night in the other room because they have to play Arkansas next week, hey, it’s up to the couple.

Or maybe what the judge was suggesting — considering how much money college players, let alone their former NFL counterparts, make — was to hire a night nurse or enlist the help of family to ease the burden.

That said, a passionate debate ensued about paternity.

“Young people, don’t listen to this,” Dallas Cowboys linebacker (and father of two boys) DeMarvion Overshawn wrote on social media over a video clip of Judge’s comments. “Be there for the mother of your child and let the rest take care of themselves.

Overshon concludes, “Midnight dinners turn into financial freedom, because nothing will motivate you more than being a great dad.”

It couldn’t be more correct to show more about this.

Being a father doesn’t mean that you should be a father when it is convenient and you are properly rested. It’s about being there for the hard things, and there will be harder things than a new dad can understand, much harder than getting up at 2 a.m. (little kids, little problems; big kids, big problems).

Those early moments are about connecting with a child you love more than you can imagine, a bond that will refocus your entire world to the point where you will do anything for them, including striving to be the best version of yourself.

This involves seeking maturity and accountability, focus and perspective. It can inspire you to be a better student, a better worker, a better friend, and certainly a better partner.

There’s no doubt that proper rest helps athletes, but replacing selfishness with selflessness and teamwork also helps. Showing a child respect for his or her mother may be the most important thing you can do.

Striking a balance between work and home is one of life’s biggest challenges, whether the office is a sold-out football stadium or not. Taking care of your family is part of every father’s job, but supporting means more than just money.

Those midnight meals produce midnight lessons that you can’t learn any other way.